A busy Autumn is coming! Welcome to the late-night adjudication, I am your host, reporting live from Moscow, and I am suffering from an advanced state of sleep-deprivation. Eight units dislodged! No shortage of offensive movement this season, as legions waged war upon legions. The early battles continue to dominate the continent, primarily seeming to be Slavs-Swedes, Romans-Arabs, French-Burgundians, Norse-Danish. There is some overlap, but of these seemingly-natural rivals, four champions will progress to the next phase of our contest!
For a more in-depth analysis, we'll go to our men on the scene. First, it's Maximus Gluteus, on the scene in Rome. Maximus, how are the locals responding to their new administration?
[MAXIMUS] Well, the Burgundians left a long time ago and in the void of administration, and in their absence it was the Byzantines who moved in first, and they were fairly well-received by the populace, being as they are cousins, albeit Greek cousins. The local provisional government was in the process of setting up their administration, and was aware of the possible threat by the Arab fleets sailing off Sardinia, but the expectation was a move against Naples, or even towards Greece itself. The local fleet was caught unawares in port, and was quickly destroyed by the Arabs, who quickly set about importing hummus and saffron in bulk. The Bishop of Rome has already been accustomed to local rule by non-Roman entities, but has not yet been available for comment about his intentions on how to live under a heathen regime. Word on the street seems to be that His Holiness has imposed upon himself a sort of In-Basilica Exile, and refuses to come out unless the new rulers permit free worship of Christianity, casual dress on Fridays, and the extension of slavery to anyone who hasn't had a haircut in the past six weeks.
Much obliged, Max. Stay safe over there! Now from Rome, we will go up the coastline to Marseilles, where Hercules Poirot gives his report. What have you unriddled for us, Herc?
[HERCULES] You are no doubt wondering why I have gathered you all into my parlour, gentlemen. As we know, it's more bad news for Burgundy, I'm afraid, as the French advance continues largely unabated. The mystery lies in the withdrawal, as we shall see. The French had Byzantine aid this time, which may finally seal the demise of Burgundy as France rebuilds the kingdom of Charlemagne. This time two Burgundian units are retreating from defeats in Genova and Avignon, but as the Burgundian collapse continues, there is some confusion as to which commanding officer outranks the other, and thus will be permitted to retreat within the walls of Marseilles. The other will be dissolved and its surviving soldiers sent home to drink the wine and adjust their accent to fit the new snail-eating overlords. Now, there has been some speculation about a caged death match between the two commanders, but these rumours seem to have been propaged entirely by one source, known solely as the Duke of New York (He's A-number one!). And yes, it is true that there can be only one who survives to fight another day, but I believe I have found a clue, a most essential clue, which sheds light on the inner machinations of the Burgundian character---
I'm sorry Herc, we'll have to cut you off there. We've just had some breaking news from the East, and we go live to the city of Vladimir, to Vee-atch-es-lav Bezumno.
[VYACHESLAV] The snow falls heavily over the onion-domed cathedrals, but overjoyed crowds still cheer the return of Slavic forces, who have freed the city from its Swedish oppressors after a summer of occupation! The jubilation of the crowds was compounded by the news that Rostov and Pest have been brought into the ever-growing Slavic nation, which now stretches from the Volga to the Danube. A small Swedish force did manage to capture Archangelsk in the north, but there is a roving Slavic unit which is causing havoc in Scandinavia. The Slavic peoples have much to be joyous about, and the prospect of expanding seems quite plausible given the current arrangement of forces along the frontier with Sweden, which is being perpetually pushed into the Baltic Sea. For the moment, a celebration is planned which will take place this coming Friday evening, and the vodka will be flowing! It's a party for the ages here in Vladimir, and the borscht will be thick!
Sounds like fun, Vaa... Via... Vlad. And now it's to rainy Merseyside, where the Norwegian king has doubled-down, is that correct, Hvedrungr?
[HVEDRUNGR] I AM HVEDRUNGR, LORD OF THIS INSOLENT PLANET! BEHOLD MY MIGHTY WRATH AS MY LOYAL CYAN MINION BRINGS HIS ARMY ACROSS THE SEAS IN LONGBOATS MADE OF THE WOOD OF YGGDRASILL, THE HIDE OF THE NIDHOGG, AND THE BREASTMILK OF THE VALKYRIES TO ENFORCE HIS MIGHTY WILL UPON THIS DESOLATE ROCK! ITS PEOPLE SHALL EAT NAUGHT BUT COD WITH POTATOES FOR THE ENTIRETY OF THEIR MISERABLE LIVES! GARGAEGGGARGGGG!!!
Well, that is fascinating. That's all the time we have for you tonight. My colleagues wish me to inform you that today is the birthday of our cameraman Dave, so happy 42nd to him. Also, the great overlord requires retreats from Burgundy, Denmark, East Rome, and Sweden. The deadline is 6th April, 20:00 GMT. Thank you for watching the twelve o'clock news at two. And more importantly, thank you for reading whatever it is that came out of my mind this nigiht.
Retreats
Burgundian A Avignon can retreat to Marseilles.
Burgundian A Genova can retreat to Marseilles.
Byzantine F Roma has no retreats, disbanded.
Byzantine F Smyrna can retreat to Aegean Sea, Eastern Mediterranean Sea, or Miklagard.
Danish A Brandenburg can retreat to Hamburg, Jomsborn, or Mecklenburg.
Danish F Goteborg can retreat to Kattegat or Ranrike.
Swedish A Rostov can retreat to Muscovy or Karelia.
Swedish A Vladimir can retreat to Viatka, so ordered.
Abbasid Caliphate:
A Burgos Supports A Toulouse
F Cypriot Sea Supports A Tarsus - Smyrna
F Gulf of Cadiz - Lisboa
F Ligurian Sea - Roma
A Lisboa - Cordoba
F Palermo Supports F Syracuse
F Syracuse Supports F Palermo
A Taron - Tarsus (*Bounce*)
A Tarsus - Smyrna
F Tyrrhenian Sea Supports F Ligurian Sea - Roma
Burgundy:
A Avignon - Auvergne (*Dislodged*)
A Bavaria - Brandenburg
F Berber Coast - Tunis (*Bounce*)
A Genova Hold (*Dislodged*)
A Hessen Supports A Bavaria - Brandenburg
A Toulouse Supports A Avignon - Auvergne (*Cut*)
Danmark:
F Bornholmer Sea - Kalmar
A Brandenburg - Hessen (*Dislodged*)
F Dogger Bank - North Sea (*Fails*)
F Dorestad - Bruges
F Goteborg Hold (*Dislodged*)
F Hastings Hold
A Jorvik Supports A Lindisfarne
A Lindisfarne Supports A Skegness - Westmorland (*Cut*)
F Reval - Baltic Sea
A Rouen - Maine
F Sea of England Supports A Lindisfarne
A Skegness - Westmorland (*Bounce*)
East Rome
A Ankara - Charsiana (*Fails*)
A Charsiana - Tarsus (*Bounce*)
F Ionian Sea - Napoli
A Pisa Supports A Lombardy - Genova
F Roma Supports F Ionian Sea - Napoli (*Disbanded*)
F Smyrna Supports A Charsiana - Tarsus (*Dislodged*)
F Spalato Supports A Venezia
F Strait of Sicily - Tunis (*Bounce*)
A Trebizond - Taron (*Fails*)
A Venezia Supports F Spalato
France:
A Auvergne Supports A Catalonia - Avignon
F Bretagne - English Channel
A Catalonia - Avignon
A Flanders - Verdun
A Koln - Frankfurt
A Lombardy - Genova
A Nantes - Toulouse (*Fails*)
A St. Gallen - Zurich
A Tirol - Bavaria
A Verdun - Savoie
Norge:
F Irish Sea Convoys A Noirmoutier - Kirkby
F Mid Atlantic Ocean Convoys A Noirmoutier - Kirkby
A Noirmoutier - Kirkby
F North Sea - Lindisfarne (*Fails*)
A Scotland Supports F North Sea - Lindisfarne
F Skagerrak Supports A Tiundaland - Goteborg
A Strathclyde Supports F North Sea - Lindisfarne
A Tiundaland - Goteborg
A Wales - Westmorland (*Bounce*)
Slavic Nations:
A Beograd - Pest
A Buda - Praha
A Burta Supports A Khazar Empire - Vladimir
A Khazar Empire - Vladimir
F Kjonugard - Gardarike
A Lapland - Nidaros
A Mordvin Supports A Viatka - Rostov
A Pest - Ruthenia
A Przemysl - Breslau (*Bounce*)
A Smolensk - Przemysl (*Fails*)
A Viatka - Rostov
A Vitebsk - Holmgard (*Fails*)
Sverige:
F Gdansk Supports F Memel
F Holmgard Supports A Rostov (*Cut*)
A Karelia - Arkhangelsk
F Memel Supports F Gdansk
A Prussia - Breslau (*Bounce*)
A Rostov Supports A Vladimir (*Dislodged*)
A Uppsala - Birka
A Vladimir Supports A Trebizond - Khazar Empire (*Dislodged*)
Independent:
A Alexandria Supports A Jorsal
A Jorsal Supports A Alexandria
A London Hold |
