Welcome back to the show, ladies and gentlemen. We're in the first hour of our telethon for a cause that I know is near and dear to all your hearts: Throwing the game to the Knights!
Let's take a look at the tote board and see how the contributions are coming along. Look at that! 21 centers! Not bad at all, but still not even halfway to our goal of 52. We need to get those phones ringing!
Wait, there's a phone call now. Who's on the line, Shirley? Why it's Tom from the Pirate Shoals! And he's calling in with a contribution of . . . his last remaining measly 13 centers! How generous!
You see, folks? Even when you're on the brink of poverty, beset on all sides by hardships and calamities, you can still dig deep and--What's that? He just looked under the cushions and found 3 more centers he grabbed last year? And he's donating those too? Amazing! But I guess when you only have 16 centers to your name, there's not much else you can do with them.
So let's update the tote board. Tympani please . . . 37 centers! Only 15 more to go! C'mon, people! Get on the phone. The Pirates can't do this all themselves!
Now I'd like to welcome the Undead Choir of Necronomicon to the stage! What? What do you mean they're not here? We sent a limo!